Dear People Who Write Open Letters,


We are on to you.  Clearly you must be aware that this is not how letters actually work.  I have to imagine that you know that more often than not, these letters are not read by their intended recipients.  Therefore I think it’s clear to absolutely everyone involved that these are more about attention than actually causing any sort of actual change.  And to the people who share said open letters, with such headlines as “Epic Open Letter to So-and-So Says What We’ve All Been Thinking,” do you understand the minute difference between sharing this “epic” open letter and sharing a passive aggressive Facebook status? Because at the end of the day, the only real difference comes down to word count.  Passive-aggressive Facebook statuses, while annoying, are short and sweet, while open letters are short stories of misdirected complaints and immaturity.  

So in the future, I must ask that you refrain from writing an open letter, opting instead, perhaps, for the more traditional “letter” format of communication.  That way, the emphasis will be placed where it appropriately belongs, (on the content of the letter) an less on the side effects more specific to open letters (people sharing it on Reddit).  I think we can all agree that these changes would lead to a better, less passive-aggressive tomorrow.  Now if someone can please post this to Buzzfeed with the headline “Little-known But Incredibly Handsome Blogger Writes Badass Takedown in Open Letter” then we can really get this ball rolling!